Who Makes Up Lefty Movements?

September 3, 2014 / 9:39 pm

gn-1

Glenn Reynolds says something so incisive about lefty movements:

“I’m beginning to think that most lefty movements are just about broken people trying to manipulate the rest of us so they can feel good about their broken selves.”

If you want to find broken selves, visit Netroots Nation, the lefty grassroots conference. I attended a couple years ago and it was depressing.

At Netroots, one of the women’s bathrooms was renamed. There was a computer printed sign on white paper that said, “UNISEX” or “All Genders” or some such taped over the “Women” sign. Basically, anyone could go in there.

So, for the couple days of the conference, every time I had to go to the bathroom, I went to the Pansexual john hoping that something exciting would happen. Would I see a man dressed as a woman? A woman dressed as a man? How would I know, if I did? Would I feel weird peeing around sexually ambiguous strangers? Would they feel weird around me, a middle aged woman dressed in traditional American garb signifying patriarchal expectations and oppression? (I wore jeans and a shirt.)

I figured the bathroom would have no shortage of visitors considering the conference attendees. There was the LGBT table. The Take-A-Picture-With-Michelle-Obama table had no line. The NOW booth gave out pink condoms. Patchouli wafted through the air. Self-unaware socialists would hazily ask you questions from behind their tables while selling campaign buttons. Incongruously, the Teamsters and the UAW and other big, burly, angry looking union members lumbered amongst the hippie riffraff. Surely, some of the above would go to the gender ambiguous (cis-and trans- gender had yet to become trendy) bathroom.

To my disappointment and delight, I had the pleasure of a pristine potty every time nature called. In fact, I’m pretty sure I was the only person to use the Gender Ambiguous bathroom the entire weekend. If you’ve attended a conference, you’ll know the joy of finding an unexpectedly spotless and empty bathroom. I had not just one empty clean stall but 20 of them to choose from. It seemed too good to be true, so I used only that bathroom every time, and every time I peed alone. Water closet nirvana at Netroots!

Netroots, the left’s radical heartbeat, was and is a collective persecution complex fighting a phantom enemy Out There (but mostly the evil Koch Brothers.) Even at Netroots, there were no sexually ambiguous people looking, like Goldilocks, for a bathroom that fit them just right. Or at least the persecuted went out of their way to find either a Men’s or Women’s bathroom. See how much self-loathing even lefties must possess?

I felt oppressed being at Netroots, but not by the bathrooms or lack thereof (although, if I had been intent on a women’s bathroom, I’d have had to go up or down stairs). The collective vibe felt, well, heavy, to borrow the 60’s term. All these miserable, yes broken, people fearful that a person might feel bad about being left out–of a bathroom. It’s pure projection. These folks feel left out, marginalized, weird, and consigned to loser status. To feel better about their sad selves, they inconvenienced the majority–who were, ironically, women. I’d blame the patriarchy but I loved having my own bathroom.

Sad.

Here’s what Lefties are worried about today, in case you think that their movement is promoting very important topics most days and save their silliness for Netroots conferences:

Mariachi Barbie Stirs Debate About Ethnic Stereotypes

The Burden of Home Cooked Dinners (to be followed up by the evil rich people who eat out and kill the environment)

Jennifer Lawrence’s Boobs [Scant mention of Muslim Rape Gangs]