Anne Hathaway Brings The Sexy…NOT

November 14, 2008 / 11:00 am • By Dr. Melissa Clouthier

Now, I’m doing this silly post and it’s not just to help a suffering brother out. I actually have an opinion about Anne Hathaway (imagine that) and it’s this: She is the least sexy Hollywood star I have ever seen. She is brown paper bag bland. She seems sweet and rather dull. If you’re going to link whore….

Bared breasts are only enticing if the girl who owns them owns them. In Ms. Hathaway’s case, I feel like I’m looking at grandma in a twenty-five year old’s body.

It’s weird. She’s weird.

So, it’s Friday and some of you boogers like you some boobs. I’ve included a picture of Ms. Hathaway for your pleasure. There are more pictures at the link and capitalist appeals, too. But really, if I were wanting to share the sexy for links, I wouldn’t be using Anne Hathaway’s feeble attempts at teh hawt. I’d share some of these ladies.

Enjoy!

This is a two-fer. I’m addicted to Coke. You’re addicted to hot blonds who have a set of pipes:

Halle Barry is all natural, baby:

Helen Mirren brings the out the lady and the tramp:

Rene Russo is the thinking man’s lady.

And for my pleasure, I’ve included good old Pierce. He’s aging well and is mighty fine.

Posted in Corrupted Culture • Entertain Me
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  • J David

    Hate to break it to you, but Halle is carrying silicone!

  • http://melissaclouthier.com Dr. Melissa Clouthier

    No way! They’re real!

  • William

    Don’t forget Selma Hayek!! Yowza…

  • Mr. Chuckles

    This needs to be a Friday tradition!

  • http://www.rpgohmy.blogspot.com John F Not Kerry

    There is nothing attractive about women letting their breasts hang like that without support. I suppose they are free to do it, but they shouldn’t think people are staring because they like it.

  • http://melissaclouthier.com Dr. Melissa Clouthier

    Mr. Chuckles,

    I’m a uniter not a divider. My new motto: Boobs to believe in.

  • Matthew

    Hear, hear! I second that.

  • Trish

    It seems to me, that out of all those women, Rene Russo is the only one who really look comfortable.

  • Diarmuid

    Scarlett Johansson anyone?

  • http://mkfreeberg.webloggin.com Morgan K Freeberg

    Sorry Melissa, I agree with you a great deal of the time, but Hathaway is hot. There are others who are hotter, Johansson does come to mind. But we straight dudes get to decide this stuff, there’s lots of actresses portrayed as being sexy who are thoroughly lacking in appeal…Ms. Hathaway is not among those.

    We don’t mind silicon. As long as it hangs *right*. All the time. Which used to be asking a lot, but the technology’s come quite aways.

    Lessee…

    Andie MacDowell is hugely overrated. Or was.

    Jane Seymour is not as appealing as the median of Bond women, she is far below it.

    A little bit of Gwen Stefani goes a long, long way.

    And Holly Marie Combs is not as hot as Alyssa Milano. Although Alyssa’s politics are awful, she’s definitely the hottest witch.

    Regarding Pierce, since I don’t swing that way, I’ll remain agnostic on that whole question and leave it up to you.

  • http://www.rpgohmy.blogspot.com John F Not Kerry

    “Jane Seymour is not as appealing as the median of Bond women, she is far below it.”

    Morgan, it sounds like you are too young to remember just how hot Jane has been in her life. For her age, she looks incredible. But you are entitled to your judgment of “hotness”.

  • Scareypete

    Ok I don’t know why or if there was any hullabaloo leading up to a post about Anne Hathaway’s boobs. I must say that for unsupported side boob it looks fine to me, the skin looks smooth, the curve looks appropriate.

    I have always considered her a lovely young lady. It is weird to me seeing her portrayed as a sex symbol now since my first knowledge of her came taking my daughter to “Princess Diaries”

    Plenty of beautiful breasts in Hollywood this is true but Miss Hathaway’s charming smile has always been her best feature.

    And Pierce? Really? Why not develop a crush on a Manly man like Bruce Willis or Clint Eastwood. Best of all both voice conservative/libertarian viewpoints.

  • Paul

    If you don’t think that picture of Anne Hathaway is sexy then you obviously have some hidden homosexual tendencies.

  • J David

    I saw Halle’s bare in a magazine once long ago, and the cuts under the areola are very obvious, and are even under clingy material in the right light. But they fooled a woman so the job was good enough, I guess…

  • WayneB

    Hey, Morgan, don’t be dissin’ my Andie MacDowell! That one’s mine!

    I agree with you about Jane Seymour, though. I always thought her face had too many pointy parts (like her chin and nose).

  • http://physicsgeek.mu.nu physics geek

    “And Holly Marie Combs is not as hot as Alyssa Milano. ”

    I must vehemently disagree with Mr. Freeberg. At least Holly’s charms, while somewhat smaller thatn Alyssa’s, appear to be real. To be fair, I’ve had a crush on Ms. Milano for a long time, but it’s far outweighed by my crush on the former Ms. Combs.

    One other thing: Anne Hathaway is plenty hot.

  • Philip

    “She is brown paper bag bland. She seems sweet and rather dull.”

    Believe it or not, that’s actually a PLUS for me. Personally, I have had it with exciting, light-up-the-party, edgy type women. They’re narcissists (well, so are exciting, light-up-the-party edgy men, but they’re not the topic). Besides, “boring” and “exciting” are in the eye of the beholder – like beauty and ugliness. So I’ll take the liberty to say “Boring IS Beautiful” – not to mention much more reliable and stable.

  • Fernanda Louise

    I am always amazed at the criticism flung at attractive people by rather average looking people.

    She is a gorgeous gal with nice boobies. Each one of the women mentioned on this post is beautiful.

    I guess everyone is entitled to their opinion, but keep it nice, okay?

  • Trish

    Fernanda Louise–
    You don’t know what the posters here look like, so your comment is a little off base.
    Do you suppose that the fact that some people consider a person beautiful is a reason no one should criticize? That’s silly. No one will be attractive to everyone, and I don’t see why those who don’t like this shouldn’t have as much right to their opinion as those who do.

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