I was sent the following article by someone who remembered my April Fools post about what men need to do to keep their relationship hot. That article set off the most bizarre set of circumstances. People believed I was serious. Men sent me adoring letters and thanked me for sharing the truth. It was amusing and disturbing all at once.
So a new book “Manslations” has been released. Here’s a snippet of a review from CNN:
Actions speak louder than words. Sure, not a novel idea, but this “duh” lesson is one that can take years to learn. If it looks, walks, and quacks like a duck, then it’s a duck.
Mac’s Golden Rule? Whenever there is any conflict between what a man says and what he does, always, always ignore what he says.
There is no such thing as a man dumping you because he is afraid of getting hurt, is frightened that his feelings are too strong, or because he finds you intimidating. Mac says to think of the simplest solution — is it that this man sensed you were the perfect woman for him, who touched him so much in deep, important places that he couldn’t handle? Or was he just not feeling it?
It’s OK to call him first — and if you get blown off, it’s not because you called first. This is my favorite piece of advice from Mac, who says the mistaken conclusion women come to when they call first post-date and get blown off is that the call made them look clingy and spooked the guy.
“This is not how it went,” says Mac. “If you called him and he blew you off, it went like this:
1. You had a great date, and he did not.
2. He planned to blow you off.
3. You called him, and nothing changed.”
Good to know about the calling part. Men aren’t all that complicated to me. But women are all unique, I readily admit. Robert Stacy McCain wrote a piece about the differences between men and women and this part was especially insightful:
Words like “thoughtful” and “sensitive” describe the qualities necessary to cooperate effectively with women. One must carefully monitor one’s interactions with them, gauge their reactions and adjust accordingly. For most men, and especially for hyper-rationalizing men like Ziegler, this is a terrifying tightrope walk across an abyss.
Most men are not naturally thoughtful and sensitive in that way, and they resent having to devote effort to “relationship management”—a task at which they suck— when it would be a far more productive use of their time to concentrate on doing the things they do best.
And yet, men want access to women so they make the effort, or sometimes do. Many men give up. The benefits of companionship don’t outweigh the challenges the relationship brings.
This natural mysterious back in forth will continue forever. What does disturb is the impulse by feminists to want to remove the masculine. There has been a concerted attempt to demonize typically masculine behavior. Worst of all, many men seem to have conceded the argument. Says McCain:
All we ever hear from them is bitch, bitch, bitch—especially when a man dares call attention to their faults. Gentlemen, you are guilty of cowardice for not speaking out more strongly in your own defense, and in defense of your fellow men.
What I wonder is if the crisis in American leadership can be traced to the crisis in manhood.
Cross-posted at RightWingNews